i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
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