I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
