Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
These 27 C*ck Blocks Are Savage AF
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.