Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize
