Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Randomize