dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
