Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Randomize
