Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
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