I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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