Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
