Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize
