Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
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