Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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