when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
I have aggressive nipples.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
