I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
