we're chasing vodka with high fives
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Randomize