worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
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