I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love