Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
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