Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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