You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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