perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Randomize