Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
