i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
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