I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
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