so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Someone came in the potted fern
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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