so that wasnt chicken after all
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Randomize
