some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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