It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize