I'd wear matching sweaters with you
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
