ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
no. you can't hotbox the world.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Randomize