Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
