i permit you to call me
your room smells of hookers.
And success
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Randomize
