This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Randomize
