Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
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