Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
where am i from again
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
