This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Randomize