i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
