actually, I'm a sock model
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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