Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
