HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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