just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Blow job season was short but glorious.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
