I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
