He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
