I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize
