I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
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