Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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