I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
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