i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
