Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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